Junk I Hate

I hate when sinks wear skirts.

Mon, 12 Mar 2012 13:02:46 -0400

I hate when sinks wear skirts.

It’s like there’s a clothing store in Chicago called, ‘90’s.’

Sat, 10 Mar 2012 15:37:33 -0500

It’s like there’s a clothing store in Chicago called, ‘90’s.’

(Why Do These Exist?)

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 16:27:07 -0500

I fucking hate jeans with embroidered pockets.

P.S.

Mon, 05 Mar 2012 22:54:09 -0500

Also, I don’t get black people with tattoos.

Taking A Poll (Well, Not Really)

Mon, 05 Mar 2012 22:52:48 -0500

Why do Hawaiians look like bloated Filipinos?

#Twitter Has Ruined Everything

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 09:48:05 -0500

It’s really uncomfortable when bands (or solo artists) say things like, “I love my fans!” Or, “I love you all!” when (maybe) 23 people know they exist.

Truth

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 11:52:45 -0500

I hate dudes who play the ukulele. I’d bet my bottom dollar that those same dudes (you know—the ones who play the ukulele) also drive Volkswagen Bugs.

Quotes Intentional

Mon, 14 Nov 2011 10:22:10 -0500

I hate when gays refer to other gays as their “family.”

RAPE Central

Thu, 13 Oct 2011 09:11:41 -0400

I hate a downstairs bathroom in a restaurant.

Shut Your Whore Mouth, Linda Yu

Fri, 07 Oct 2011 23:21:53 -0400

I hate newscaster banter.

Shut the Fuck Up, Creep

Tue, 27 Sep 2011 19:54:39 -0400

I just heard someone [INTENTIONALLY] use the word ‘lover’ in a sentence. (It was really creepy.) I hate the word ‘lover’ and frankly, I can’t think of a single scenario wherein it would EVER be OK to use it.

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall [Please Don't Break]

Thu, 22 Sep 2011 17:38:58 -0400

I hate her face. I also hate it when she cries. She just might be the ugliest-crying person on the television (and off the television).

I DON'T KNOW HER

Mon, 19 Sep 2011 15:11:32 -0400

I hate that everyone in my family is constantly referencing Ellen. It’s like just because I’m gay [YAWN] and she’s gay, they automatically assume we’re friends.

I hate that I want to motorboat the hell out of Hank Azaria.

Sun, 18 Sep 2011 22:58:35 -0400

I hate that I want to motorboat the hell out of Hank Azaria.

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night [No I Don't]

Tue, 28 Jun 2011 13:59:08 -0400

I hate when people wear [everyday] glasses (as in regular glasses for seeing, reading, driving, etc.) with dark-tinted lenses. I HATE THESE. They’re like indoor sunglasses, but not dark enough to be sunglasses. (And who wants to be the douche wearing sunglasses indoors? [We’re not all part of the Jersey Shore cast.])

No Pizza Place

Fri, 27 May 2011 17:17:12 -0400

Do ~~all~~ most black people have outie belly buttons? In yoga today, there were two black guys and a black girl (no pizza place) and all three had outie belly buttons. WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF ALL THREE HAVING THE SAME ~~EXACT~~ BELLY BUTTON? I’m not scientist, but I could probably hypothesize or whatever that “All Black People Have Outie Belly Buttons.”

Untitled

Thu, 26 May 2011 22:39:07 -0400

I’m not into adults who skateboard. (And for the record, I’ve never been into lady-skateboarders, either.) I imagine these same adults (who skateboard) are the same ones who still have roommates.

The Karaoke Scene in '500 Days of Summer' Was Alright, But Enough Is Enough [Is Enough]

Wed, 27 Apr 2011 11:15:56 -0400

I hate that Cotton® commercial with Zooey Deschanel. (I really wish she’d STOP singing.)

Does anyone know what (the) Mona Lisa has to do with AIDS?

Tue, 26 Apr 2011 21:27:07 -0400

Does anyone know what (the) Mona Lisa has to do with AIDS?

Goodbye, Kitty

Sat, 09 Apr 2011 14:27:00 -0400

People (read: ladies [a lot of whom are Asian]) who are still into Hello Kitty memorabilia as adults really creep me out. It’s like they’re wearing a sign that says, “HEY! I WAS MOLESTED!”